Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Life is . . .

I seriously have no words to write right now.  I just got back from taking my daughter to her dance class which was cancelled.  We got there and her sweet dance teacher was in tears.  Her brother-in-law had been killed doing border control in AZ.  I hate it when violence hits close to home.  I like living in my naive little world where nothing bad happens to me.  I didn't know how to react.  I've never lost a sibling and I hope I never have to when they are young.  I've lost great grandparents, but I still have 2 great grandmothers alive and all of my grand parents are still live and kicking strong.  Death is not something I am use to, and to be honest, I do not want to get use to it.  It's no fun.  Even though I KNOW my family is a forever family and I WILL see my family again, death still hurts.

As I think about death and this trial for my friend, I realize me not losing weight is so minimal to the worlds trials right now.  It seems so petty now to be sad and frustrated over such a trivial thing.  I hope I can focus more on other people and serving them than on what is not happening or what is going wrong in my life.

Monday, October 1, 2012

It's hard -

We are buying tickets to Hawaii this week.  We will be going in January or February.  I am excited and yet mad at the same time.  This time last year when we decided we would go, I was determined to be down to my goal weight.  It is now one year later and here I sit at the exact same weight as before.  I am ready to go to the doctor about not losing weight but not until I give it my all.  Over the next 4 weeks I will be keeping track of EVERYTHING that goes in my mouth.  It's a new month so I can start new!  Here's to October!