Confusing and Hard

I am going to rant and vent here for a second!

Weightloss is SO confusing and hard!

They say just burn more calories than you take in - not true - I burned over 3000 calories and stayed under my calorie goal and was between 1600-1800 calories/day!

They say don't eat too many calories.  They say don't eat to little calories.  And yet you see people using programs that take you down to 500-1000 calories with people having AMAZING results. I even personally know some of these people and I am so proud of them, but restricting down that much is not in the cards for me.

There are calorie calculators that say eat this many calories to lose weight.  I do that.  I follow it all. And then I have no loss.  I don't know how to do it!  I don't know how you all do it!

With the calculators they say choose if you are sedentary, active, moderately active, etc.  Who is to say that?  Who says if I am sedentary or active?  How do I choose? Some days I feel like I am so active and other days I sit at the computer all day every day and the only activity I get is my workout for the day!  How do you balance that?

They say you're eating too little, you're eating too much.  They say drink more water, cut out soda, don't eat out.  I tell you what!  I don't drink soda EVER!  I don't eat candy, well, sometimes I do, but not regularly.  We NEVER go out to eat.  I promise you, my family and I eat out about once a month and that is it.  I don't know where else I can change!  I don't know what to do.  There are so many conflicting statements out there and I feel like I have tried it all.

Although I am frustrated I will continue it and work hard because although I had a week of no loss, I am getting stronger.  I am able to do T25 with less modification.  I can feel the strength increasing!  I am loving it, although I am struggling.

Here's to a better, stronger week!  Please, help lift me up too!

Weekends are HARD ~

I have a love - hate relationship with the weekend!  During the week I am SO strong!  I am home all day, everyday, and rarely have a chance to flub up, unless there is something emotional going and and then I will find a way, any way, to flub up! Weekends are another story!

Weekends are SO hard for me!  At least the weekends like this weekend! Saturday we spent from 9 AM until 6 PM out and about running errands, having fun, and spending $$$! 

 We went to Trafalga in Orem and had some fun playing mini golf as a family.  We indulged in a pizza for the family and some dippin dots.  That is something we NEVER do.  I try to think it's the memories that count!  I hold that to my heart because spending time with my children and making memories really does matter to me and I know they love those times when we get out and do something different.

Today was another difficult day.  We blessed my dear Caydee and while it is a beautiful thing to have family around for the celebration of a baby, it is also very difficult. You know how the family bbq's go! 

There was shredded bbq chicken, cookies, cake, chips, pop, juice, etc.   Lucky for me I was nursing Caydee during the time everyone was dishing up so by the time I got to the desserts, there wasn't much left!  But, for breakfast, as we were driving to church I realized I hadn't eaten breakfast and I was starting to feel sick and weak and mentioned to my mom and she had a butterfinger in her car so that was it! 

It seems like there is always a weekend like this that comes up, nearly every weekend!  Next weekend is Mother's day, Susan G. Komen Race day, and Cris's birthday.  The next weekend is a farewell party, Carsyn's birthday, and the next I think is memorial.  I need help!  Weekends suck the life out of me!  My goals for this week is to better plan for this next weekend so I can make the best choices I can for the weekend we have.  Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated!

Weight: 208 (no change :( )

Waist: 43 (no change)

Hips - 50 (down 1/2 inch)

Legs and Arm - I forgot to measure

How is it that the week I work the HARDEST (I burned on average 800 calories a day) I don't lose anything.  On top of weekends being hard, losing weight is REALLY hard!  I need to figure this out.  I cannot gain more weight and I NEED to be healthy and fit for my family!

2 Week Results -

Hey Hey, it's results day!!!

I had a couple days that really were hard for me!  Friday, Saturday, and Sunday really killed me.  Sunday was GREAT until my little ones asked to make a Sunday treat.  How can I say no to these faces?

Yesterday was actually pretty good but I did eat some candy and had a couple swallows of soda which I haven't had in MONTHS!

Anyway,  my results for the 2nd week weren't as big but still awesome!

My waist I lost another inch! Hips, half an inch, my legs and arms kind of stayed the same. To celebrate my success I got me a couple new outfits!  Here is one of them!  I was always scared to rock the leggings, but I am loving them!  I have another outfit that is super awesome too!

Weight - 208 (Down 1.8 lbs)

Waist - 43 (1 inch)

Hips - 50.5 (1/2 inch)

Legs and Arms stayed the same!

Perfection -

I am here to say - not every day is perfect!  I use to think that once I lost all the weight I need to lose, that would be it!  As I have been going through this for the last 3 years, I know that is not how it will work.

I had a SUPER busy day today.  It was suppose to be this super relaxing day of nothing because my husband had 3 of my kids but I chose to make it busy, get out of the house, and run all day long! I finally got my shake in and T25 around 10:00 PM thanks to my husband.  He literally dragged me from my bed to downstairs to get it done. It's been a rough few days of no sleep because of my little baby and I thought I could just "do it tomorrow"!  No excuses when it's just 25 minutes!

I had a few successes and fails today, which is where the title comes in.  There are days where I am strong.  Nothing tempts me.  I am unbeatable.  But then there are days like today where life just happens the way it does and you just have to say "it's ok!"

My major success was not eating a plethora of cookies that were on a plate right in front of my nose.  Normally when I had that at my disposal, I would have eaten two or three!  Today I skipped the cookie and went for lunch meat, no bread, no mayo, half slice of cheese, and carrots.  It was SO hard, but I felt SO strong afterwards!  There was also a bunch of soda but I went for water.  If things are free, I usually will just say eh, why not.  Today I skipped the free goodies and went for the free healthy goodies!

This afternoon is when I fell a little though.  We took the kids to the movies and had some starbursts and tootsie rolls.  I probably had 4 tootsies and 8 starbursts while watching the movie.  We also had pizza for dinner and I had 2 slices.  I still consider that a small success because I wanted more.  Normally I would eat 3 or 4 slices.

I am slowly realizing that this will be a life long battle I will have.  It use to be discouraging to me, now it is motivating.  I choose to win this battle.  I feel that before I came to earth, I chose this battle.  With the knowledge we had then, the perfect knowledge, I knew that I would be able to handle this challenge, and win.

Recently I heard a story of a completely disabled girl, who will never be married or have children, and she had such a positive attitude.  She knew that she had chosen to live that challenge and that she would have what she wanted and more in the life to come.  I choose to take on that attitude today.  I too choose to win this battle that God has given me.  Instead of looking at it as a burden and "why me?", I will now look at it as "why not me!" I know it seems petty considering some challenges friends, family, and strangers all over the world face, but this is my challenge, and I choose to win it!

First Week Results! ~ And Emotional Eating

I am so excited to post my results after week 1!!!
I meant to post Sunday or even yesterday, but life sure does get the best of you!

 I am down 2.6 lbs, 2 inches off my waist (I measured 3 times to make sure!), 1 1/4 inches off my hips, 1 inch off each thigh, and my arms pretty much stayed the same! 

I truly didn't know if it was going to work but by the end of the week I was noticing my pants not staying up like I like them too, so I knew something was happening! 

I have started LOVING the shakes!  I know I have posted how I have more energy, less cravings, etc. Those things are still happening!  I thought once I got use to the shakes it would get less and less but it hasn't!  I didn't drink a shake on Sunday and I tell you what, it was the worst day, EVER! There was a lot of emotional eating going on (more on that below) and I gave in to a lot of Easter m&m's and more.  

I started week 2 of T25 with my husband.  We both noticed how we are already a lot stronger or more focused.  We were able to complete more of the workout without modifying.  That is HUGE for me because there is A LOT of jumping involved!

I am so glad I took the plunge and bought the shakeology and T25!  My next goal after T25 is getting 21-day Fix.  Looks amazing and I have heard amazing things from it!

Now, on to emotional eating!  

It's very hard to distinguish between physical and emotional hunger, isn't it? These are some great guidelines to help us differentiate between the two!

I think we all have times when we eat emotionally.  Food is a comfort.  At least for me it has grown to be.  It doesn't matter if it is healthy food or junk food but it is a comfort of some sort.  On Sunday there was a lot of stress in my life.  Kids were crazy, I was grouchy, baby was sad, husband was cranky, you know those days, we all have them.  I hate it when they land on Sundays because Sundays are usually my best days where I reflect to try harder the next week.  I guess I still did that by the end of the day but there was a lot of crap eating before I stopped myself.  

A friend posted this on facebook this morning and I knew I had a topic to write about.  I need your help on how you overcome emotional eating?  How do you battle it?  What are some solutions you have found work for you?

Disgusting -

Last night as I was doing day 3 of T25, there was a lot of jumping involved.  Normally I wear tight pants, like biker shorts, but capri's.  Last night I decided to wear basketball shorts and boy was that a BAD decision!  I could LITERALLY hear my lower abdominal fat slap against my legs and lower abs.  It made me want to vomit.  What have I done to myself?  Why did I let it get this far?  Why is losing weight so hard for me?  Why is it so hard to stay on track, eat healthy, and do it all?

I know that we are sent to Earth to learn and grow.  Sometimes I wish I were born with the genes to be skinny without thinking about it.  To be what the world thinks is beautiful.  I wish that Satan didn't have so much hold on the hearts of men (and women) to make us feel ugly, fat, stupid, etc.  It makes me so irritated when I look at myself in the mirror and think "ewww, yuck, disgusting, ugly, fat, etc." because then IMMEDIATELY after I think - that's not true.  I hate that he can get to me like that!!!

I want more than anything to overcome this obstacle of weight!  I want to be FREE of the hold it has on me.  I also want to always love the body I have!  I am grateful for the body I have.  That I am able to have children.  Four beautiful children in fact!  I am so grateful for that!  I hope that I can teach my daughters to love themselves, no matter what, but I can only do that, if I show the same respect to myself!

Once upon a time . . .

Once upon a time a beautiful girl (me!) got pregnant with our fourth little one!  It turned out to be a BEAUTIFUL little girl.  She is pretty amazing!

Thanks Marissa Vargason Photography

Then, one day, this new momma decided it was time to get off her butt and do something.  She couldn't wait a year or more to get back into gear. She thought about it, and thought about it, but the gym just wasn't in the schedule of this sweet little angel.  

Many dear friends had shown her different plans.  Isagenix, Take Shape for life, beachbody, etc. Some seemed like great plans but man alive, she could not afford an extra $300-$400/month just for her food. 

Then  she remembered dear friend telling thisher about beachbody and shakeology for a while now, but she was always reluctant to try it. Shakes rarely taste good.  It seemed like a cheat to her, and she wanted to do it all on her own!

She decided to try all the samples she had been given over a weeks time and see where it went.  At first they were AWFUL!  She had to gag them down.  Forcefully swallow them.  And she wanted to die.  There was no way she was buying this stuff!  

But then she realized something.  She had so much more energy.  No craving for warm chocolate chip cookies, brownies, or candy occupying her brain at all hours of the night.  It was amazing.  If she could feel like this, she could deal with the nasty taste for a while!  And to top it off, in that week, without added exercise, she lost 3 POUNDS!!!

After thinking about it for another 2 weeks, she couldn't wait any longer.  She worked so hard on her own those two weeks.  She watched what she ate, stayed under calories, worked out nearly every day but lost nothing.  She was bummed.  

She decided to talk to her Prince, Mr. Major Frugal.  She just knew he would say no again.  He had so much faith in her winning this obesity thing on her own, he knew she could do it.  But She boy was she surprised when he said yes.  Granted there was a lot of analyzing, laying out all the different options, cost effectiveness, etc. but in the end, Prince Frugal agreed to let her try.

And so begins my story.  Among all the analyzing, laying out all the different options, cost effectiveness, and different strategies, I decided to become a coach.  I have always wanted to help other people achieve fitness and health goals.  I fell in love with working out a few years ago, and I can't stop!  We purchased the Focus T-25 challenge pack.  It is a 10 week program and it is HARD!  I completed the first workout last night.  I thought Jillian was hard, but woah man!  This is a total different ball game!

Please join me as I document this journey.  I am happy to say I purchased the vanilla shakeology and actually like it now.  I think it took getting a lot of the sugar out of my body.  I just wasn't use to something like a smoothie, not tasting like a shake or a jamba juice smoothie!

I hope to update a few times a week, with weigh-ins on Sundays!  Here's to losing 70-80 pounds!

My starting info is -

Weight: 212 lbs

Hips: 52 1/2 inches

Waist: 47 inches

Chest: 39 1/2 inches

Left Arm: 15 inches

Left Leg: 28 inches